Turning 30

I turned 30 in the past year, and it’s been a moment of reflection for me. Growing up, I always pictured turning 30 as this milestone where you’d magically have everything figured out—a solid career path, a significant other, and a perfectly mapped-out life plan. Spoiler alert: that’s not exactly how it works.

Instead, my 20s were filled with all kinds of twists and turns—some fun, some less so. But through it all, I picked up a few lessons that changed how I look at life, myself, and what success really means. I want to share those lessons with you because, honestly, they’ve made a huge difference in how I feel stepping into this new decade.

Whether you’re in your 20s, 30s, or somewhere on the path of figuring it all out, I hope my experiences resonate with you. If nothing else, maybe they’ll make you feel a little less alone on your own journey.

Everything Will Be Okay (Even When It Doesn’t Feel Like It)

In my early 20s, I started my career in consulting, and to put it simply—I struggled. About six months in, I was assigned to a qualitative-heavy project, and no matter how many hours I poured into my work, my manager still wasn’t satisfied. Before I knew it, I was put on a Performance Improvement Plan (PIP). In that moment, I thought, “Oh shit, my career is over before it even started.”

But then, fortunately, I got assigned to a purely quantitative project—and I thrived. I was able to get out of the PIP, and that experience taught me that sometimes it’s about finding the right fit for your skills. It also reminded me that things can turn around even when you feel like you’ve hit rock bottom.

This lesson would prove valuable again when I made my next career move. After consulting, I took a 50% pay cut to become a Sales Development Representative (SDR) at an early-stage startup because I wanted to learn how to sell. Little did I know that an SDR’s main job is cold-calling strangers in the hopes of finding potential customers. Since English isn’t my first language, I couldn’t even finish my opening line before getting hung up on in most of my calls. This was the second time I thought I was screwed.

However, about a month into the SDR role, the CEO asked if anyone could analyze sales data. I was the only person on the team who really knew Excel from my consulting days, so I jumped at the chance. He loved my work and kept giving me more projects. Eventually, I carved out a whole new position in sales operations. It was another moment where I thought I was doomed, only to have things work out in a completely different (and better) way.

As Steve Jobs famously said, “You can’t connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backward.” I believe everything happens for a reason, and maybe the difficult situations we face are blessings in disguise down the road.

Confidence = Keeping Promises to Yourself

In my early 20s, I wasn’t very confident, largely because I was self-conscious about my skin and my height. But over time, I realized that confidence doesn’t come from how others perceive you—it comes from following through on the goals you set for yourself.

For instance, I’ve been performing magic since I was a teenager, and I absolutely love performing. I often wondered what life would be like if I performed magic full-time. In my mid-20s, I decided I wanted to land at least one paid gig to see if I could become a professional magician. I built a website, printed business cards, and emailed event organizers offering to perform for free. Eventually, I booked a charity event, which led to my first paid gig at a kid’s birthday party. That experience was a game-changer. Even though I didn’t pursue magic as a full-time career, seeing that I could make it happen boosted my self-belief in a way nothing else had.

This newfound confidence carried over into other areas of my life. In my late 20s, I told myself I wanted to create value by sharing what I was learning—and so this blog was born. Writing in English is still quite challenging for me, but I have written 16 posts over two years. Following through on that promise—even when it was tough—made me feel proud and more certain of what I'm capable of.

The New Meaning of Success

In my early 20s, I was all about work. I’d think about it non-stop, even on weekends. I'll never forget being at a house party with friends, surrounded by laughter and music, but my mind was still stuck on spreadsheets and deadlines. My best friend pulled me aside and called me out for not being present. That conversation was a wake-up call—I was so wrapped up in my career that I'd forgotten how to just be in the moment.

That realization pushed me to make a change. I decided to move to NYC—not because I had a dream job lined up, but because I wanted to develop other parts of my life I'd been neglecting. Surrounded by my close friends, new energy, and endless possibilities, I started to see that success isn't just about getting promotions or collecting a bigger paycheck.

As I get older, I realize that having a healthy body, mind, and spirit is essential to living life to the fullest. I began therapy to better understand myself, worked out almost every day, and even added a morning meditation routine. I also made a conscious effort to spend more quality time with my loved ones—reaching out to friends, improving my relationship with my dad and brother, and visiting my parents more often.

Focusing on my well-being and relationships brought me a sense of peace and gratitude I’d never experienced before. I realized success isn’t only measured by titles or paychecks—it’s about having strong connections with the people you care about and taking care of yourself so you can genuinely enjoy the life you’re building.

Conclusion

As I wrap up these reflections on turning 30, I realize this milestone isn’t an endpoint—it’s just the start of a new chapter. My 20s were about figuring out who I was and what mattered to me; now, I feel ready to take those lessons and actually put them into practice. I still don’t have everything figured out, but I’m grateful for the clarity I’ve gained along the way.

If any of these lessons resonate with you—whether you’re 20, 30, 40, or somewhere in between—I hope they remind you that it’s never too late to redefine success, follow through on your own goals, and trust that things can turn out okay in the end. Thanks for reading, y’all. Let’s keep learning, keep growing, and keep creating lives that feel true to who we are.

I welcome y'all to ask yourself: what are some of your key learnings in the last decade?

Here’s to the next chapter—and all the unexpected lessons it’ll bring.

Feel free to share your reflections, thoughts, or feedback with me @themagichen on Instagram or reach me at themagichen@gmail.com